{"id":12821,"date":"2018-11-23T14:50:44","date_gmt":"2018-11-23T13:50:44","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.freieresleben.com\/1-the-basis-empathic-narcissistic-magnetism-8-common-basic-conflicts\/"},"modified":"2024-10-31T19:27:03","modified_gmt":"2024-10-31T18:27:03","slug":"empathic-narciss-attract-8-core-conflict","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.freieresleben.com\/en\/empathic-narciss-attract-8-core-conflict\/","title":{"rendered":"#1 Empathic-Narcissistic Attraction | 8 Common core conflicts"},"content":{"rendered":"\t\t<div data-elementor-type=\"wp-post\" data-elementor-id=\"12821\" class=\"elementor elementor-12821 elementor-3094\" data-elementor-post-type=\"post\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<section class=\"elementor-section elementor-top-section elementor-element elementor-element-dac3f65 elementor-section-stretched elementor-section-boxed elementor-section-height-default elementor-section-height-default\" data-id=\"dac3f65\" data-element_type=\"section\" data-e-type=\"section\" data-settings=\"{&quot;background_background&quot;:&quot;classic&quot;,&quot;stretch_section&quot;:&quot;section-stretched&quot;}\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-container elementor-column-gap-default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-column elementor-col-100 elementor-top-column elementor-element elementor-element-80567be\" data-id=\"80567be\" data-element_type=\"column\" data-e-type=\"column\">\n\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-wrap elementor-element-populated\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-6f2d8ad elementor-toc--minimized-on-tablet elementor-widget elementor-widget-table-of-contents\" data-id=\"6f2d8ad\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-settings=\"{&quot;headings_by_tags&quot;:[&quot;h3&quot;],&quot;exclude_headings_by_selector&quot;:[],&quot;no_headings_message&quot;:&quot;No headings were found on this page.&quot;,&quot;marker_view&quot;:&quot;numbers&quot;,&quot;minimize_box&quot;:&quot;yes&quot;,&quot;minimized_on&quot;:&quot;tablet&quot;,&quot;hierarchical_view&quot;:&quot;yes&quot;,&quot;min_height&quot;:{&quot;unit&quot;:&quot;px&quot;,&quot;size&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;sizes&quot;:[]},&quot;min_height_tablet&quot;:{&quot;unit&quot;:&quot;px&quot;,&quot;size&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;sizes&quot;:[]},&quot;min_height_mobile&quot;:{&quot;unit&quot;:&quot;px&quot;,&quot;size&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;sizes&quot;:[]}}\" data-widget_type=\"table-of-contents.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-toc__header\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<h4 class=\"elementor-toc__header-title\">\n\t\t\t\tOverview\t\t\t<\/h4>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-toc__toggle-button elementor-toc__toggle-button--expand\" role=\"button\" tabindex=\"0\" aria-controls=\"elementor-toc__6f2d8ad\" aria-expanded=\"true\" aria-label=\"Open table of contents\"><i aria-hidden=\"true\" class=\"fas fa-chevron-down\"><\/i><\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-toc__toggle-button elementor-toc__toggle-button--collapse\" role=\"button\" tabindex=\"0\" aria-controls=\"elementor-toc__6f2d8ad\" aria-expanded=\"true\" aria-label=\"Close table of contents\"><i aria-hidden=\"true\" class=\"fas fa-chevron-up\"><\/i><\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div id=\"elementor-toc__6f2d8ad\" class=\"elementor-toc__body\">\n\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-toc__spinner-container\">\n\t\t\t\t<i class=\"elementor-toc__spinner eicon-animation-spin eicon-loading\" aria-hidden=\"true\"><\/i>\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-eaffcd6 elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"eaffcd6\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<h3 class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\">Introduction | <b>Why <\/b>that series?<\/h3>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-187ed4e elementor-widget elementor-widget-text-editor\" data-id=\"187ed4e\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"text-editor.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<p class=\"western\"><strong><em>&#8220;The moment you recognize a pattern, you can make the powerful decision to step out of it.&#8221;<\/em><\/strong><\/p><p>This article is the basic article in a series of articles on the eight common conflicts in an <a href=\"https:\/\/www.freieresleben.com\/en\/empath-narcissist-key-toxic-relationships\/\"><strong><u>empathic-narcissistic dynamic<\/u><\/strong><\/a> and the <b>two different coping modes<\/b> (active\/passive). In terms of content, we are moving here in a world of terminology. These are necessary for description, even if they are very oriented to the mind. But the mind also needs something to think about ;-). So let\u00b4s give it direction!<\/p><p>You can apply the following information to <u>any form of narcissistic\/co-narcissistic<\/u> or even a dual soul relationship. They reflect\u00a0<b>two sides of the same coin<\/b>.<\/p><p>You may have already learned about many theories, ideas, and concepts. Dual souls, narcissism, empathy, addiction. <b>Concepts<\/b> can give you a sense of security, a form of support, orientation. But every <strong><u>concept also creates limitations, walls<\/u><\/strong> and generalizations. If you get too attached to it, evaluations and judgments may arise within you that limit your view of yourself and the world.<\/p><p>You will find real answers to your questions beyond all concepts only in one place: in your heart. No one can dictate <a href=\"https:\/\/www.freieresleben.com\/en\/mirror-process-inner-universe\/\"><span style=\"text-decoration: underline;\"><strong>your inner, individual truth<\/strong><\/span><\/a>.<\/p><p>What I am doing is about offering helpful information for you to reflect upon.<br \/>Because all theories agree on one thing: That it is always about <b><u>you<\/u><\/b>, your<b> love for yourself<\/b>, your <b>authentic being<\/b>, your <b>growth <\/b>towards yourself. <br \/>Everything is cyclical and in motion: Nature prepares, grows, blooms, fades, rests. Each phase has its very own time. You as a human being are also in preparation, in growth, flourishing, letting go, resting. You are <u>constantly<\/u> moving and changing. Even though it may not always feel that way.<\/p><p>Change always happens <b>now<\/b>. And always with ourselves. We <u>cannot<\/u> change the past and other people. But we can try to understand. What actually happens (has happened) and why. We can try to find and pick up our growth impulse in this soup of experience.<\/p><p>Us humans have difficulties with acceptance of <u>transience<\/u>. Because it is painful to let go of a notion, idea or even a person. Perhaps we lack the confidence that the phase of passing will again be followed by preparation, growth and blossoming. When something passes away, it hurts. We don&#8217;t want the pain. But perhaps we have also stored the meaning of pain incorrectly?<\/p><p>Why were some of your experiences so painful? What have you done to deserve this pain? Why did you of all people have to go through such an experience?<br \/>Have you ever asked yourself such questions?<\/p><p>A question for you: <u>What if pain only shows, that\u00a0<b>something old has become too tight for you<\/b>?<\/u> That you have outgrown an experience that may have been important to you \u2013 but <b>no<\/b> longer serves you?<br \/>What if pain was <u>a signal that\u00a0<b>change<\/b> is needed to continue<\/u> to grow? That your soul reached a limit? Are you familiar with the term <b>growing pains<\/b>?<\/p><p>Pain hurts because it wakes you up. To feel, become aware, and face a choice: to use this pain for pointing the finger at life or other people, to blame something or someone for this pain \u2013 or &#8211;\u00a0<u>to utilize pain as motivation to find out, <b>what your soul wants to tell you with this pain<\/b><\/u>.<\/p><p class=\"western\">The\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/www.freieresleben.com\/en\/empath-narcissist-key-toxic-relationships\/\"><strong><u>empathic-narcissistic dynamics<\/u><\/strong><\/a> can provide <a href=\"https:\/\/www.freieresleben.com\/en\/15-keys-heal-empaths-empathic-narcissistic\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><u><strong>valuable impulses<\/strong><\/u><\/a>\u00a0for conscious self-reflection. It remains a concept that may help you locate the issues within you:<\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-76557d3 elementor-grid-1 elementor-grid-tablet-1 elementor-posts--align-center elementor-widget__width-initial elementor-grid-mobile-1 elementor-posts--thumbnail-top elementor-posts--show-avatar elementor-card-shadow-yes elementor-posts__hover-gradient elementor-widget elementor-widget-posts\" data-id=\"76557d3\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-settings=\"{&quot;cards_columns&quot;:&quot;1&quot;,&quot;cards_columns_tablet&quot;:&quot;1&quot;,&quot;cards_columns_mobile&quot;:&quot;1&quot;,&quot;cards_row_gap&quot;:{&quot;unit&quot;:&quot;px&quot;,&quot;size&quot;:35,&quot;sizes&quot;:[]},&quot;cards_row_gap_tablet&quot;:{&quot;unit&quot;:&quot;px&quot;,&quot;size&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;sizes&quot;:[]},&quot;cards_row_gap_mobile&quot;:{&quot;unit&quot;:&quot;px&quot;,&quot;size&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;sizes&quot;:[]}}\" data-widget_type=\"posts.cards\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-posts-container elementor-posts elementor-posts--skin-cards elementor-grid\" role=\"list\">\n\t\t\t\t<article class=\"elementor-post elementor-grid-item post-12828 post type-post status-publish format-standard has-post-thumbnail hentry category-toxic-relationships tag-aufrichtigkeit tag-boundaries tag-coping-mechanisms tag-emotional-intelligence tag-empathic-relationships tag-empathy-development tag-healing-empaths tag-healthy-boundaries tag-mental-wellness tag-narcissistic-dynamics tag-personal-growth tag-self-healing-techniques tag-setting-boundaries tag-sincerity\" role=\"listitem\">\n\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-post__card\">\n\t\t\t\t<a class=\"elementor-post__thumbnail__link\" href=\"https:\/\/www.freieresleben.com\/en\/15-keys-heal-empaths-empathic-narcissistic\/\" tabindex=\"-1\" ><div class=\"elementor-post__thumbnail\"><img fetchpriority=\"high\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"1024\" height=\"575\" src=\"https:\/\/www.freieresleben.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/05\/15_tipps_empath.jpg\" class=\"attachment-full size-full wp-image-12392\" alt=\"empath\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.freieresleben.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/05\/15_tipps_empath.jpg 1024w, https:\/\/www.freieresleben.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/05\/15_tipps_empath-300x168.jpg 300w, https:\/\/www.freieresleben.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/05\/15_tipps_empath-600x337.jpg 600w, https:\/\/www.freieresleben.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/05\/15_tipps_empath-768x431.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 1024px) 100vw, 1024px\" \/><\/div><\/a>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-post__badge\">TOXIC RELATIONSHIPS<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-post__avatar\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-post__text\">\n\t\t\t\t<h3 class=\"elementor-post__title\">\n\t\t\t<a href=\"https:\/\/www.freieresleben.com\/en\/15-keys-heal-empaths-empathic-narcissistic\/\" >\n\t\t\t\t15 keys to heal for empaths after an empathic-narcissistic relationship\t\t\t<\/a>\n\t\t<\/h3>\n\t\t\n\t\t<a class=\"elementor-post__read-more\" href=\"https:\/\/www.freieresleben.com\/en\/15-keys-heal-empaths-empathic-narcissistic\/\" aria-label=\"Read more about 15 keys to heal for empaths after an empathic-narcissistic relationship\" tabindex=\"-1\" >\n\t\t\tRead more \"\t\t<\/a>\n\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/article>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-83a613f elementor-widget elementor-widget-text-editor\" data-id=\"83a613f\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"text-editor.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<p><span style=\"font-family: var( --e-global-typography-text-font-family ), Sans-serif; font-weight: var( --e-global-typography-text-font-weight );\">This article and my work is an&nbsp;<\/span><strong style=\"font-family: var( --e-global-typography-text-font-family ), Sans-serif;\">offer<\/strong><span style=\"font-family: var( --e-global-typography-text-font-family ), Sans-serif; font-weight: var( --e-global-typography-text-font-weight );\">, a part of my truth that I want to bring to the world.<\/span><\/p>\n<p>Check for yourself, what information serves you to&nbsp;allow <strong>your growth<\/strong> happen <strong>more consciously<\/strong>.&nbsp;I&nbsp;can&#8217;t know&nbsp;<strong>what serves you<\/strong>. This is part of&nbsp;<strong>your individuality&nbsp;<\/strong>and<strong>&nbsp;decision<\/strong>.<\/p>\n<p>With this series I would like to&nbsp;<strong>address this exact point<\/strong>. It is designed to give you the opportunity to&nbsp;<strong>recognize<\/strong>&nbsp;experiences with the&nbsp;<a href=\"https:\/\/www.freieresleben.com\/en\/causes-consequence-narcissis-narcissistic\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><strong><u>narcissistic counterpart<\/u><\/strong><\/a> and understand them. On the other hand, I\u00b4m pointing out a pathway to achieve&nbsp;<b>real<\/b> &nbsp;<strong>protection<\/strong>, which originates from &#8211;&nbsp;<strong>love for yourself<\/strong> (your energy remains with you!).<\/p>\n<p><b>H<\/b><strong>ow to distance yourself from a narcissistic person<\/strong>&nbsp;and stay focused on yourself? How to&nbsp;<strong>protect<\/strong> from having such an experience again?<\/p>\n<p>A desperate and angry attempt to protect oneself is blaming the&nbsp;<strong>narcissistic person<\/strong>&nbsp;and demonizing them. This further drains&nbsp;<strong>energy<\/strong>&nbsp;from you. It&nbsp;<strong>weakens<\/strong>&nbsp;and traps you in a&nbsp;<strong>destructive<\/strong>,&nbsp;<strong>energetic cycle<\/strong>.<\/p>\n<p>If you persist focusing on your counterpart,&nbsp;you&nbsp;<strong>miss the<\/strong>&nbsp; <strong>growth impulses<\/strong>, the possible&nbsp;<strong>messages of your soul<\/strong>&nbsp;.<\/p>\n<p>From my perspective, the only effective protection is to reprogram the <strong>energetic pattern<\/strong> within you that kept you in toxic relationships, attracted <strong>corresponding partners<\/strong>, and maintained such&nbsp;<strong>dynamics<\/strong>. Your&nbsp;<strong><u>authentic self<\/u><\/strong>&nbsp;is your protection.<\/p>\n<p>It takes courage to search for answers&nbsp;<span style=\"font-family: var( --e-global-typography-text-font-family ), Sans-serif; font-weight: var( --e-global-typography-text-font-weight );\">within. It demands<\/span><span style=\"font-family: var( --e-global-typography-text-font-family ), Sans-serif; font-weight: var( --e-global-typography-text-font-weight );\">&nbsp;your&nbsp;<\/span><strong style=\"font-family: var( --e-global-typography-text-font-family ), Sans-serif;\">recognition<\/strong><span style=\"font-family: var( --e-global-typography-text-font-family ), Sans-serif; font-weight: var( --e-global-typography-text-font-weight );\">,&nbsp;<\/span><strong style=\"font-family: var( --e-global-typography-text-font-family ), Sans-serif;\">understanding<\/strong><span style=\"font-family: var( --e-global-typography-text-font-family ), Sans-serif; font-weight: var( --e-global-typography-text-font-weight );\">, and your <\/span><strong style=\"font-family: var( --e-global-typography-text-font-family ), Sans-serif;\">decisions<\/strong><span style=\"font-family: var( --e-global-typography-text-font-family ), Sans-serif;\">.<\/span><span style=\"font-family: var( --e-global-typography-text-font-family ), Sans-serif; font-weight: var( --e-global-typography-text-font-weight );\">&nbsp;Thus,<\/span><span style=\"font-family: var( --e-global-typography-text-font-family ), Sans-serif; font-weight: var( --e-global-typography-text-font-weight );\">&nbsp;you change that very<\/span><strong style=\"font-family: var( --e-global-typography-text-font-family ), Sans-serif;\">&nbsp;energetic blueprint<\/strong><span style=\"font-family: var( --e-global-typography-text-font-family ), Sans-serif; font-weight: var( --e-global-typography-text-font-weight );\"> within you: by dissolving the <\/span><strong style=\"font-family: var( --e-global-typography-text-font-family ), Sans-serif;\">belief of lack<\/strong><span style=\"font-family: var( --e-global-typography-text-font-family ), Sans-serif; font-weight: var( --e-global-typography-text-font-weight );\">, old beliefs and integrating <\/span><strong style=\"font-family: var( --e-global-typography-text-font-family ), Sans-serif;\">feelings<\/strong><span style=\"font-family: var( --e-global-typography-text-font-family ), Sans-serif; font-weight: var( --e-global-typography-text-font-weight );\">,&nbsp;<\/span><strong style=\"font-family: var( --e-global-typography-text-font-family ), Sans-serif;\">facets<\/strong><span style=\"font-family: var( --e-global-typography-text-font-family ), Sans-serif; font-weight: var( --e-global-typography-text-font-weight );\">,&nbsp;and&nbsp;<\/span><strong style=\"font-family: var( --e-global-typography-text-font-family ), Sans-serif;\">longings<\/strong><span style=\"font-family: var( --e-global-typography-text-font-family ), Sans-serif; font-weight: var( --e-global-typography-text-font-weight );\"> that have since eked out their existence in the <\/span><strong style=\"font-family: var( --e-global-typography-text-font-family ), Sans-serif;\">shadow of<\/strong><span style=\"font-family: var( --e-global-typography-text-font-family ), Sans-serif; font-weight: var( --e-global-typography-text-font-weight );\"> your <\/span><a href=\"https:\/\/www.freieresleben.com\/en\/mirror-process-inner-universe\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><span style=\"font-family: var( --e-global-typography-text-font-family ), Sans-serif;\"><b><u>inner universe<\/u><\/b><\/span><\/a><span style=\"font-family: var( --e-global-typography-text-font-family ), Sans-serif; font-weight: var( --e-global-typography-text-font-weight );\">.<\/span><\/p>\n<p>This is <b><u>not<\/u><\/b> about <strong>blaming, improving yourself<\/strong>&nbsp;&#8211; just to take&nbsp;responsibility for another person&#8217;s <strong>misfortune<\/strong>. It is not about self-optimization but about <b>clarity<\/b>&nbsp;&#8211; toward self-acceptance, loving <b>self-responsibility<\/b>, and <b>self-compassion<\/b>.<\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-c4d23e1 elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"c4d23e1\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<h3 class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\">Empathic-Narcissistic <b>Magnetism <\/b>| <b>Similiraty <\/b>(Common Conflicts)<b> &amp; Differences <\/b>(Modes)<\/h3>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-99a940f elementor-widget elementor-widget-text-editor\" data-id=\"99a940f\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"text-editor.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<p class=\"western\">In relationships between <strong><a href=\"https:\/\/www.freieresleben.com\/en\/causes-and-effects-of-the-narcissistic-wound\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><u>narcissistic<\/u><\/a><\/strong> and <strong><a href=\"https:\/\/www.freieresleben.com\/en\/empathic-between-love-and-dependency\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><u>empathic people<\/u><\/a><\/strong>, a strong magnetic dynamic often exists. This connection is influenced by an <strong>energetic signature<\/strong> that attracts a <strong>corresponding partner<\/strong>, creating cycles that trap both in recurring negative patterns.<\/p><p class=\"western\">Why does this happen? Is there a <strong>solution<\/strong>, a way out of the <a href=\"https:\/\/www.freieresleben.com\/en\/empath-narcissist-key-toxic-relationships\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><strong><u>empathic-narcissistic relationship dynamics<\/u><\/strong><\/a>?<\/p><p class=\"western\">You may feel stuck, knowing the relationship is damaging yet unable to leave. This \u201cstickiness\u201d comes from both &#8211; shared conflicts and opposing traits.<\/p><p class=\"western\"><strong>Similarities<\/strong> and <strong>differences<\/strong> both fuel attraction. In <a href=\"https:\/\/www.freieresleben.com\/en\/empath-narcissist-key-toxic-relationships\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><strong><u>empathic-narcissistic relationships<\/u><\/strong><\/a>, it\u2019s about a <strong>core similarity<\/strong> and a <strong>core difference<\/strong> between partners, which makes the bond feel inescapable.<\/p><p class=\"western\"><strong>The Core Similarity<\/strong>: The same <strong>basic conflicts.<\/strong><br \/><strong>The Core Difference<\/strong>: Two <strong>opposite coping modes<\/strong> in dealing with these conflicts.<\/p><p class=\"western\">Here\u2019s a brief outline of essential terms and the <strong>eight <a href=\"https:\/\/en.wikipedia.org\/wiki\/Basic_conflict\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\"><u>basic conflicts<\/u><\/a><\/strong>, as defined by psychoanalytic theory in the <a href=\"https:\/\/en.wikipedia.org\/wiki\/Operationalized_Psychodynamic_Diagnostics#Axis_III_%E2%80%93_Conflict\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\"><strong><u>OPD conflict axis<\/u><\/strong><\/a> (Operationalized Psychodynamic Diagnostics).<\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t<section class=\"elementor-section elementor-top-section elementor-element elementor-element-fe7f7ca elementor-section-stretched elementor-section-boxed elementor-section-height-default elementor-section-height-default\" data-id=\"fe7f7ca\" data-element_type=\"section\" data-e-type=\"section\" data-settings=\"{&quot;background_background&quot;:&quot;classic&quot;,&quot;stretch_section&quot;:&quot;section-stretched&quot;}\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-container elementor-column-gap-default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-column elementor-col-100 elementor-top-column elementor-element elementor-element-0be4914\" data-id=\"0be4914\" data-element_type=\"column\" data-e-type=\"column\">\n\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-wrap elementor-element-populated\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-7a244b1 elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"7a244b1\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<h3 class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\"><b>Collusion <\/b>| conflict, coping modes &amp; <b>consequences<\/b>.<\/h3>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-9e2c40d elementor-widget elementor-widget-text-editor\" data-id=\"9e2c40d\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"text-editor.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<p>We now delve deeper and explore the nature of a collusion, the underlying conflicts, coping modes, and the effects that such a constellation can have.<\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-35c4e21 elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"35c4e21\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<h3 class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\">1. what is <b>collusion?<\/b><\/h3>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-a52c9b1 elementor-widget elementor-widget-text-editor\" data-id=\"a52c9b1\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"text-editor.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<p class=\"western\">According to <strong><a href=\"https:\/\/en.wikipedia.org\/wiki\/Collusion_(psychology)\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\"><u>J\u00fcrg Willi<\/u><\/a><\/strong> (1975), in a so-called <strong><a href=\"https:\/\/en.wikipedia.org\/wiki\/Collusion_(psychology)\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\"><u>collusion<\/u><\/a><\/strong>, two (or more) people come together around the same <strong><a href=\"https:\/\/en.wikipedia.org\/wiki\/Basic_conflict\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\"><u>basic (or core) conflict<\/u><\/a><\/strong>. This bond helps them avoid the <b>fears<\/b> tied to their conflicts and satisfy unconscious <b>childhood needs<\/b>. Much of this process is <b>unconscious<\/b>.<\/p><p class=\"western\">Metaphorically, two people <u>dance around the same issue<\/u>, happy that the other does not touch the <a href=\"https:\/\/www.freieresleben.com\/en\/causes-consequence-narcissis-narcissistic\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><span style=\"text-decoration: underline;\"><strong>shared wound<\/strong><\/span><\/a>, creating a strong connection. Usually, both partners have a <strong>similar conflict<\/strong> but try to resolve it with <strong>different coping modes<\/strong>. One partner deals with the conflict <u>actively<\/u>, while the other takes a <u>passive<\/u> approach. The similarity creates a strong, almost indescribable <strong>attraction<\/strong>, as each partner is drawn to the other\u00b4s differences in dealing with it.<\/p><p class=\"western\">The other person\u2019s <strong>opposite coping mode<\/strong> complements one&#8217;s own. Like positive and negative charges, they <b><u>combine<\/u><\/b> to create a feeling of <strong>balance<\/strong>, <strong>harmony<\/strong>, and <b>wholeness<\/b> that none of them feels <u>within themselves<\/u>. Although it feels as if burdens, fears and conflicts are resolved, in reality, they are not.<\/p><p class=\"western\">Over time, the other\u2019s <strong>different approach<\/strong> shifts from being attractive to feeling <strong>threatening<\/strong>. Each partner\u2019s way of coping pulls the other toward the <strong>fears<\/strong> they initially tried to hide from. <strong>Primal fears<\/strong> and <strong>repressed conflicts<\/strong> begin to surface, creating tension, frustration, and even panic in the relationship.<\/p><p class=\"western\">This can be an opportunity to <strong>look inward<\/strong>, fostering <strong>self-reflection<\/strong> and growth. However, fears and <u>emotional entanglements<\/u> often make this hard. Instead, each partner focuses on the <strong>other<\/strong>, while their own inner conflicts remain unconscious. Rather than resolving &amp; integrating issues within, they try to fight them <u>outwardly<\/u> through blame, accusations, and escalating arguments.<\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-4f8aebb elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"4f8aebb\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<h3 class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\">2. what is a<b> basic conflict?<\/b><\/h3>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-524b414 elementor-widget elementor-widget-text-editor\" data-id=\"524b414\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"text-editor.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<p class=\"western\">A <strong><a href=\"https:\/\/en.wikipedia.org\/wiki\/Basic_conflict\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\"><u>basic (or core) conflict<\/u><\/a><\/strong>, in the context of this series and from a psychodynamic perspective, is present when a person feels an inner <b>contradiction<\/b> between values, goals, desires, and needs.<\/p><p class=\"western\">Conflicts are basically <strong>normal<\/strong> and <strong>part of everyday life<\/strong>. Everyone has conflicts within. Psychodynamic basic conflicts, however, relate to <strong>old, unresolved childhood issues<\/strong>, not to current, everyday conflicts (though they may often appear in daily life).<\/p><p class=\"western\">The issue arises when these internal conflicts and contradictions remain <strong>unconscious<\/strong> and there are no <strong>effective strategies<\/strong> to handle them, leading to a sense of <strong>inflexibility<\/strong>. This creates a <strong>conflict tension<\/strong>. This tension can provoke <strong>fear<\/strong> since it may challenge our <strong>self-image<\/strong> (<i>&#8220;this is who I am&#8221;<\/i>). We may wonder: are we really the person we believed ourselves to be?<\/p><p class=\"western\">Conflicting feelings, needs, or desires that don&#8217;t align with our constructed <strong>self-image<\/strong> can be unsettling. The more strongly we are <strong>identified with<\/strong> this image, the more these contradictions can <strong>unsettle<\/strong> us and, yes, even <strong>cause fear<\/strong>. To ease this tension and reduce anxiety, we tend to use <strong>defense mechanisms<\/strong> to some extent.<\/p><p class=\"western\">Now, let\u2019s explore this further with an example conflict.<\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-7892bb2 elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"7892bb2\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<h3 class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\">3. <b>active<\/b> and <b>passive<\/b> mode | example <b>individuation<\/b> vs. <b>dependency<\/b><\/h3>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-5c5fd1f elementor-widget elementor-widget-text-editor\" data-id=\"5c5fd1f\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"text-editor.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<em style=\"font-family: var(--e-global-typography-text-font-family), Sans-serif; font-weight: var(--e-global-typography-text-font-weight);\">Stefanie had a very dominant mother, so she often had to put her own wishes and <b>needs<\/b> aside. Sensing her mother\u2019s needs was crucial for emotional survival (cf. <a href=\"https:\/\/www.freieresleben.com\/en\/high-sensitivity-and-the-empathic-wound-between-unconditional-love-and-dependence\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><strong>empathic imprinting<\/strong><\/a>). This left her with little chance to grow as an <strong>individual<\/strong> and develop <strong>independence<\/strong>. Her self-image is now that of a <strong>modest<\/strong>, <strong>empathetic<\/strong>, and <strong>considerate woman<\/strong>, focused on others\u2019 needs.<\/em>\n\n<em>Her friend Viktor, however, is <strong>independent<\/strong> with many interests and usually <strong>does his own thing<\/strong> without attending to others\u2019 needs. Due to his <a href=\"https:\/\/www.freieresleben.com\/en\/causes-consequence-narcissis-narcissistic\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><strong>narcissistic imprinting<\/strong><\/a>, he learned early that <b>attachment<\/b> often leads to <b>pain<\/b> and is therefore <strong>risky<\/strong>. He was frequently told that \u201creal boys don\u2019t cry,\u201d making his inner world the only safe place for him, where he alone matters, and hurtful feedback from others <strong>cannot reach him<\/strong>. His goal is independence.<\/em>\n\n<em>Stefanie and Viktor share the <strong>same conflict<\/strong>: <strong>individuation vs. dependency<\/strong>. Each of them manages this in <strong>different ways<\/strong> when it comes to relationships. Both feel <strong>fear<\/strong> when encountering the other\u2019s mode. Viktor deals with this conflict <strong>actively<\/strong> (individuation), while Stefanie does so <strong>passively<\/strong> (dependency).<\/em>\n\n<em>A typical situation in their undefined relationship could be: Viktor plans to go sailing with friends without Stefanie. Stefanie could now consider her own (previously repressed and unconscious) <b>needs for autonomy<\/b> and decide to take her own trip (moving towards individuation).<\/em>\n\n<em>Such steps would be <strong>new<\/strong> for her and thus <strong>scary<\/strong>. Viktor\u2019s trip sparks a <strong>longing<\/strong> in her, yet it\u2019s also <strong>scary<\/strong> due to past hardships. She feels her <strong>conflict<\/strong> and <strong>fear<\/strong>. Instead of pursuing her own independence, she worries about <strong>losing his attention<\/strong> and having to face the <b>fear of loss<\/b> alone (dependency).<\/em>\n\n<em>Stefanie tells herself (consciously) that she <strong>supports<\/strong> Viktor\u2019s trip and doesn\u2019t want to hold him back (&#8220;this is who I am&#8221; &#8211; self-image). Subconsciously, though, she feels <strong>envy<\/strong> and <strong>anger<\/strong> about him taking the trip alone. This awakens <strong>old needs<\/strong> blocked by her past conditioning (toward individuation). She feels <strong>anxiety<\/strong> and <strong>tension<\/strong>. To protect her <strong>self-image<\/strong> and avoid facing her <b>conflict<\/b>, she deflects by blaming herself for her <strong>envy<\/strong> and <strong>anger<\/strong> (self-criticism). To keep her self-image intact, she overly encourages Viktor to take the trip (<a href=\"https:\/\/en.wikipedia.org\/wiki\/Reaction_formation\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><strong><u>reaction formation<\/u><\/strong><\/a>).<\/em>\n\n<em>She may <strong>not be fully aware of<\/strong> these feelings and may even feel <strong>ashamed<\/strong> (dependency). She also fears an <strong>argument<\/strong> or even a <strong>breakup<\/strong> if she expresses her needs openly, since she knows that Viktor would feel restricted. Instead, she remains in <u>passive<\/u> mode (dependency), indirectly reinforcing Viktor\u2019s <u>active<\/u> mode. Thus, the <strong><u>balance<\/u> between individuation and dependency<\/strong> is maintained <u>externally<\/u>, though neither of them resolves the conflict internally.<\/em>\n\n<em>That evening, Stefanie\u00b4s body responds to inner tension with a migraine. Viktor, reluctantly, sits with her instead of packing for his trip. Stefanie gets his <strong>attention<\/strong> and can keep her <strong>self-image<\/strong>. She still encourages Viktor to go on the trip, while he feels <strong>constricted<\/strong> and experiences (unconscious) <strong>fear<\/strong> (of closeness and dependency), along with <u>anger<\/u> at feeling hindered in pursuing his independence. He is relieved once he leaves from her and &#8211; does not contact her throughout his trip.<\/em>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-01f17a6 elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"01f17a6\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<h3 class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\">4. <b>effects of<\/b> unconscious <b>collusion<\/b><\/h3>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-37ae867 elementor-widget elementor-widget-text-editor\" data-id=\"37ae867\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"text-editor.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<p class=\"western\">This example illustrates the dynamics of how <strong>active<\/strong> and <strong>passive modes<\/strong> play out and how each partner\u2019s <strong>core conflict<\/strong> can come to the surface. In this example, the <strong>passive mode<\/strong> is detailed more for Stefanie\u2019s case, though Viktor\u2019s <strong>active mode<\/strong> also follows a <strong>pattern<\/strong>. For him, Stefanie\u2019s <strong>dependency<\/strong> creates fear. He too has an <strong>unconscious longing<\/strong> for a healthy integration of <strong>dependency<\/strong>, yet this longing is <strong>fearful<\/strong> and conflicts with his <strong>self-image<\/strong>. Neither of them finds balance within themselves because they cannot consciously integrate the other side.<\/p><p class=\"western\">In an unconscious collusion, both partners prevent a <strong>necessary, conscious processing<\/strong> of their inner <strong>conflicts<\/strong> by maintaining a <strong>complementary<\/strong> dynamic.<\/p><p class=\"western\">Put simply: Viktor\u2019s (unconscious) <strong>need for <a href=\"https:\/\/www.freieresleben.com\/en\/causes-consequence-narcissis-narcissistic\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><u>dependency<\/u><\/a><\/strong> and attention is externalized onto Stefanie. This triggers <strong>fear<\/strong> in him, but also a sense of <strong>balance<\/strong>, helping him avoid his conflict. Similarly, Stefanie\u2019s (unconscious) <strong>need for individuation<\/strong> is personified in Viktor and also triggers <strong>fear<\/strong>. She feels she <strong>needs<\/strong> him, thus achieving a sense of balance while avoiding her conflict. Both experience the <strong>illusion of completeness<\/strong> through their partner (a magnetic attraction and sense of familiarity), which allows them to avoid confronting, integrating, and resolving their inner conflicts.<\/p><p class=\"western\"><strong>Arguments<\/strong> occur at the <strong>interpersonal level<\/strong>, where each partner fights in the other what they haven\u2019t integrated within themselves. This marks the beginning of the <a href=\"https:\/\/www.freieresleben.com\/en\/empath-narcissist-key-toxic-relationships\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><strong><u>empathic-narcissistic drama cycle<\/u><\/strong><\/a>. Note: This isn\u2019t about blame! The concept of <strong>guilt<\/strong> doesn\u2019t apply in the framework from which these articles originate. It\u2019s about <strong>awareness<\/strong>.<\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t<section class=\"elementor-section elementor-top-section elementor-element elementor-element-4d3b24d elementor-section-stretched elementor-section-boxed elementor-section-height-default elementor-section-height-default\" data-id=\"4d3b24d\" data-element_type=\"section\" data-e-type=\"section\" data-settings=\"{&quot;background_background&quot;:&quot;classic&quot;,&quot;stretch_section&quot;:&quot;section-stretched&quot;}\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-container elementor-column-gap-default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-column elementor-col-100 elementor-top-column elementor-element elementor-element-fc3bf62\" data-id=\"fc3bf62\" data-element_type=\"column\" data-e-type=\"column\">\n\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-wrap elementor-element-populated\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-3a70dca elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"3a70dca\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<h3 class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\">Overview: <b>7 <\/b>(8)<b> Core conflicts<\/b> according to OPD<\/h3>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-9aa3e1a elementor-widget elementor-widget-text-editor\" data-id=\"9aa3e1a\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"text-editor.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<p class=\"western\">OPD means Operationalized Psychodynamic Diagnostic. In this introductory article, you have already learned a lot of <strong>complex information<\/strong> about the magnetism of <a href=\"https:\/\/www.freieresleben.com\/en\/empath-narcissist-key-toxic-relationships\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><strong><u>empathic-narcissistic dynamics<\/u><\/strong><\/a>, the assumed underlying conflicts, and coping modes.<\/p>\n<p class=\"western\">Before I conclude this <strong>introductory article<\/strong>, I would like to give you a brief <u><a href=\"https:\/\/www.researchgate.net\/figure\/Conflicts-according-to-the-Operationalized-Psychodynamic-Diagnosis-OPD-2_tbl1_370129740\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><strong>overview of the eight core conflicts<\/strong> (according to OPD, seven):<\/a><\/u><\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-178d7d1 elementor-widget elementor-widget-image\" data-id=\"178d7d1\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"image.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<a href=\"https:\/\/www.researchgate.net\/figure\/Conflicts-according-to-the-Operationalized-Psychodynamic-Diagnosis-OPD-2_tbl1_370129740\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<img decoding=\"async\" width=\"695\" height=\"638\" src=\"https:\/\/www.freieresleben.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/11\/Conflicts_OPD_collusion2.jpg\" class=\"attachment-large size-large wp-image-18258\" alt=\"\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.freieresleben.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/11\/Conflicts_OPD_collusion2.jpg 695w, https:\/\/www.freieresleben.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/11\/Conflicts_OPD_collusion2-300x275.jpg 300w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 695px) 100vw, 695px\" \/>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/a>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-2e9b027 elementor-widget elementor-widget-text-editor\" data-id=\"2e9b027\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"text-editor.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<p>Image adopted from <a href=\"https:\/\/www.researchgate.net\/figure\/Conflicts-according-to-the-Operationalized-Psychodynamic-Diagnosis-OPD-2_tbl1_370129740\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><u><b>Researchgate<\/b><\/u><\/a><\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-4ebabaa elementor-widget elementor-widget-text-editor\" data-id=\"4ebabaa\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"text-editor.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<p class=\"western\">You can read the <u>corresponding articles<\/u>\u00a0for the conflicts on this site, just by clicking them:\u00a0<\/p><p class=\"western\"><u><a href=\"https:\/\/www.freieresleben.com\/en\/2-toxic-relationship-indiv-dependency\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><strong>1. individuation vs. dependence<\/strong><\/a><br \/><a href=\"https:\/\/www.freieresleben.com\/en\/3-conflict-toxic-relation-submiss-control\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><strong>2. submission vs. control<\/strong><\/a><br \/><a href=\"https:\/\/www.freieresleben.com\/en\/4conflict-toxic-relationship-care-autarky\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><strong>3. care vs. autarky<\/strong><\/a><\/u><strong>\u00a0<\/strong><u><br \/><a href=\"https:\/\/www.freieresleben.com\/en\/5-conflicts-toxic-relationship-self-worth\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><strong>4. self-worth conflict<\/strong><\/a><\/u><u><br \/><a href=\"https:\/\/www.freieresleben.com\/en\/6-core-conflict-toxic-relationships-guilt\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><strong><u>5. guilt conflict<\/u><\/strong><\/a><\/u><u><br \/><strong>6. oedipal conflict<br \/>7. identity conflict<br \/>8. averted perception of conflict and feelings<\/strong><br \/><\/u><\/p><p class=\"western\">The <strong>other articles<\/strong> in this series explore each individual conflict (click on the items in the list).<br \/>The assignments I make therein (empathic\/narcissistic) to the respective modes are based on <strong>model conceptions<\/strong> that have emerged from a combination of <strong>existing<\/strong> theoretical concepts, <strong>professional<\/strong>, and <strong>personal experience<\/strong>.<br \/>In the articles on <a href=\"https:\/\/www.freieresleben.com\/en\/high-sensitivity-and-the-empathic-wound-between-unconditional-love-and-dependence\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><strong><u>empathic<\/u><\/strong><\/a> and <a href=\"https:\/\/www.freieresleben.com\/en\/causes-consequence-narcissis-narcissistic\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><strong><u>narcissistic wounds<\/u><\/strong><\/a>, you can read in more detail what I am referring to.<\/p><p class=\"western\">You\u2019ll also find <a href=\"https:\/\/www.freieresleben.com\/en\/empath-narcissist-key-toxic-relationships\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><strong><u>here<\/u><\/strong><\/a> a simplified and practical approach for understanding <a href=\"https:\/\/www.freieresleben.com\/en\/empath-narcissist-key-toxic-relationships\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><strong><u>empathic-narcissistic dynamics<\/u><\/strong><\/a>.<br \/>These insights can be used for <strong>self-reflection<\/strong>, even if you don\u2019t identify as <strong>highly sensitive<\/strong> or <strong>empathic<\/strong> (co-narcissistic traits).<\/p><p class=\"western\">Namast\u00e9 and all the love,<\/p><p class=\"western\">Your Kristina<\/p>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t<section class=\"elementor-section elementor-top-section elementor-element elementor-element-6f7bb07 elementor-section-stretched elementor-section-boxed elementor-section-height-default elementor-section-height-default\" data-id=\"6f7bb07\" data-element_type=\"section\" data-e-type=\"section\" data-settings=\"{&quot;stretch_section&quot;:&quot;section-stretched&quot;,&quot;background_background&quot;:&quot;classic&quot;}\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-container elementor-column-gap-default\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-column elementor-col-100 elementor-top-column elementor-element elementor-element-05a3218\" data-id=\"05a3218\" data-element_type=\"column\" data-e-type=\"column\">\n\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-wrap elementor-element-populated\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-043cb8d elementor-widget elementor-widget-heading\" data-id=\"043cb8d\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"heading.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t<h3 class=\"elementor-heading-title elementor-size-default\">Invitation<\/h3>\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-element elementor-element-0e95761 elementor-widget elementor-widget-text-editor\" data-id=\"0e95761\" data-element_type=\"widget\" data-e-type=\"widget\" data-widget_type=\"text-editor.default\">\n\t\t\t\t<div class=\"elementor-widget-container\">\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\tIf you\u2019re considering being accompanied through the <a href=\"https:\/\/www.freieresleben.com\/en\/mirror-process-inner-universe\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><span style=\"text-decoration: underline;\"><strong>mirror process of inner work<\/strong><\/span><\/a>, you can book a <a href=\"https:\/\/psysoulogy.youcanbook.me\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><b><u>free preliminary talk in my booking calendar<\/u><\/b><\/a> at the top right of this page or below this entry.\n\n<span style=\"color: var(--e-global-color-text); font-family: var(--e-global-typography-text-font-family), Sans-serif; font-weight: var(--e-global-typography-text-font-weight);\">The <\/span><span style=\"color: var(--e-global-color-text); font-family: var(--e-global-typography-text-font-family), Sans-serif; font-weight: bolder;\">model assumptions<\/span><span style=\"color: var(--e-global-color-text); font-family: var(--e-global-typography-text-font-family), Sans-serif; font-weight: var(--e-global-typography-text-font-weight);\"> are based on years of professional<\/span> <span style=\"color: var(--e-global-color-text); font-family: var(--e-global-typography-text-font-family), Sans-serif; font-weight: bolder;\">observation<\/span><span style=\"color: var(--e-global-color-text); font-family: var(--e-global-typography-text-font-family), Sans-serif; font-weight: var(--e-global-typography-text-font-weight);\">, personal<\/span> <span style=\"color: var(--e-global-color-text); font-family: var(--e-global-typography-text-font-family), Sans-serif; font-weight: bolder;\">experience<\/span><span style=\"color: var(--e-global-color-text); font-family: var(--e-global-typography-text-font-family), Sans-serif; font-weight: var(--e-global-typography-text-font-weight);\">, and knowledge from<\/span> <span style=\"color: var(--e-global-color-text); font-family: var(--e-global-typography-text-font-family), Sans-serif; font-weight: bolder;\">psychoanalysis, psychodynamics, and developmental psychology<\/span><span style=\"color: var(--e-global-color-text); font-family: var(--e-global-typography-text-font-family), Sans-serif; font-weight: var(--e-global-typography-text-font-weight);\">. For more information, please refer to the<\/span> <a style=\"text-decoration-line: underline;\" href=\"https:\/\/www.freieresleben.com\/en\/copyright\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><span style=\"color: var(--e-global-color-text); font-family: var(--e-global-typography-text-font-family), Sans-serif; font-weight: bolder;\">Copyright<\/span><\/a><span style=\"color: var(--e-global-color-text); font-family: var(--e-global-typography-text-font-family), Sans-serif; font-weight: var(--e-global-typography-text-font-weight);\"> notice. The articles, including assumptions and hypotheses, may be<\/span> <span style=\"color: var(--e-global-color-text); font-family: var(--e-global-typography-text-font-family), Sans-serif; font-weight: bolder;\">shared freely<\/span><span style=\"color: var(--e-global-color-text); font-family: var(--e-global-typography-text-font-family), Sans-serif; font-weight: var(--e-global-typography-text-font-weight);\">, but please always provide<\/span> <span style=\"color: var(--e-global-color-text); font-family: var(--e-global-typography-text-font-family), Sans-serif; font-weight: bolder;\">attribution\u00a0<\/span><span style=\"color: var(--e-global-color-text); font-family: var(--e-global-typography-text-font-family), Sans-serif; font-weight: var(--e-global-typography-text-font-weight);\">(my name and the website).<\/span>\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t<\/section>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Overview Introduction | Why that series? &#8220;The moment you recognize a pattern, you can make the powerful decision to step out of it.&#8221; This article<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":12411,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_glsr_average":0,"_glsr_ranking":0,"_glsr_reviews":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[857],"tags":[976,1019,1020,973,1018,1022,986,1021,974,892,961,966],"class_list":["post-12821","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-toxic-relationships","tag-conflict-resolution","tag-core-conflicts","tag-emotional-dependency","tag-emotional-manipulation","tag-empath-and-narcissist-attraction","tag-empathy","tag-healing-from-trauma","tag-narcissistic-behavior","tag-personal-boundaries","tag-relationship-dynamics","tag-self-awareness","tag-toxic-relationships"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.freieresleben.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/12821","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.freieresleben.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.freieresleben.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.freieresleben.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.freieresleben.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=12821"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.freieresleben.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/12821\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.freieresleben.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/12411"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.freieresleben.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=12821"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.freieresleben.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=12821"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.freieresleben.com\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=12821"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}